The first post on this blog was a year ago. It talked about the demise of my 10 year relationship, and how sad and lost I still felt. Today is now 2 years that we have been apart. I’m happy to say that I am in a much better place emotionally than I was a year ago. It took me much longer to move on than I ever expected. It took about another 4 to 6 months to really get over the hurt. I still have lingering effects from everything that happened during the first year of our breakup. I have major trust issues. My self-esteem took quite a blow. I’m not sure I am ever going to be able to love whole heartedly again. But I am so happy that the tears have stopped. I am happy that the pangs in my heart have stopped when I see her. I’m grateful to feel somewhat “normal” again.
I hope one day soon to meet someone that can remind me of how a relationship is supposed to be. Someone I can trust with my heart, and with my kids. For now, my kids are my life, and I’m doing my best to make sure I can give them all of me. For too long, I sleepwalked through life, barely making it day to day. Now I’m ready to live again.
As for my ex, today (Halloween) is her 1 yr wedding anniversary. It doesn’t bother me as much as it has in the past. Her and I still don’t get along, and mostly that is because of her “wife” and the short leash she keeps her on. We are still parents to our little princess, but the friendship we once had is gone.
I’m going to try and be a better blogger. I tend to only write when I am upset about something. I need to learn to celebrate the good in life, instead of give myself over to just the negative. I’m so thankful for my kids and a few wonderful friends. May the next year bring happiness so that one day I won’t even remember this day as anything other than Halloween.
